Friday, December 08, 2006

Employee Of The Year

So tonight was my very first party for my new job. Let me just enumerate the faux pas(s...plural for faux pas?) I committed:

1.) Arrived over an hour late due to happy hour margarita consumption.
2.) Did not wrap White Elephant gift.
3.) White Elephant gift was bottle of cheap wine.
4.) The majority of party attendees were a.) under 21 and b.) Muslim....thereby rendering my unwrapped gift both illegal AND disrespectful.
5.) In a fit of nervous energy I managed to spill an entire glass of red wine on both my boss and host's white carpet AND on my daughter.

I'm available throughout the holiday season to enliven your party, offend your guests, and ensure a steam cleaning!

2 comments:

Kate said...

Oh my gosh! Poor Alannah!

Alannah said...

I'm a class act, I'll tell you what.