Thursday, October 25, 2007

Stick A Fork In Me

I'm done.

I have nothing left to give, y'all. I'm a drained shell of a human being.


I love love. And I love it when people I love love each other and celebrate it in front of everyone else who loves them.

So I'm honored and thrilled to take part in such a ceremony this weekend. As crazy as this month has been, it's great to cap it off by squeezing myself into a bridesmaid dress (my third in two years!) and celebrate with a truly wonderful group of people.

In related know, I've been in some scary places (alone in big cities late at night, very old graveyards late at night, Southern Baptist services), but they do not compare with the most terrifying place on this planet - DAVID'S BRIDAL. That place gives me the willies like nothing else. Did you know you could also buy bridal Barbie (not actual Mattel-approved) dolls there? What kind of adult buys a bride Barbie? And the women who work there are relentlessly cheerful and optimistic (surely a sign that they're either a.) robots b.) aliens or c.) heavily medicated) and appear to truly LOVE dealing with wedding parties on a daily basis. Now that's just wrong. I really love the ladies who've asked me to be in their weddings and therefore go to David's Bridal multiple times for fittings and purchases - but I'm afraid that next time I'll be kidnapped by the Bride-bots and forced to smile all day and be able to spot the difference between ivory and off-white at ten paces.


miss marty said...

did i ever tell you about my david's bridal experience? if not, get ready and i'll tell you in person in december! it was terrifying.

Alannah said...

I knew it!

The David's Bridal people are all hiding cloven hooves and tails!

5 of 9er said...

You could not be more right on... David's Bridal (yes, I've been in one) is a nightmare.

carolyn says said...

i don't even like typing the words d----- b----- in case it summons them to the UK where i am safe

Anonymous said...

My promise to you is that you shall not have to go to David's Bridal EVER on my account.

I love love, too. I do not love David's Bridal.

ReckenRoll said...

I had no idea David's Bridal was a national chain. I thought it was just in the NW!!

That's a truly scary thought. It's SPREADING.