Sunday, October 19, 2008

Sunday Evening Stream of Consciousness

Hannah and Her Sisters is on. As a teenager living in the country outside Eureka Springs, about as rural as you can get around here, I was fascinated with anything urban and urbane. I was also painfully self conscious about appearing to be a poser of any kind, so my love affair with everything New York was more just as an observer. I think I might have actually read every page in the Andy Warhol Diaries. Now that's some tedious dedication bordering on obsession.

The day I discovered Woody Allen was a monumental one. One of the highlights of my adolescence was seeing Manhattan on the big screen in a theater in Williamstown, Mass. I wanted to live in his world, a place where people talk about art, philosophy, history, and architecture, live in comfortably interesting and sophisticated lofts, go to the symphony and listen to jazz, and are openly and proudly neurotic. I loved these people - so fussy, casually brilliant, and hilariously given to their basest desires. His characters walked alone around the city, threw lively dinner parties, read voraciously, and had deep inner lives. I acutely wanted that sort of life as an adult. I was an Elitist poser! Maybe I still am!

Woody Allen movies (the classic ones) could never work today. All the women would have blogs and all the men would be addicted to online porn.

I slept on the couch Friday night (I always do when D. is out of town) and I don't even remember going to sleep last night. My body aches and groans. I know I’m not treating it right. I’m getting better on making healthy, vegetarian meals but on the other hand I’m eating baked goodies at work at least twice a week and craving things like frozen Cokes and Nutter Butters. Gross! That’s not me! And yet….it is.

Stella is vacuuming right now. Today it so happens to be my favorite sound in the world.

In the car on the way home today I did something I never do. I turned off the stereo. Late afternoon sun made the RED RED leaves of the Bradford pears even more extreme in their redness. Lucy stuck her head out the window, sniffing to beat the band. The silent drive felt wistful and private; a sigh of summer’s final surrender to autumn. If I leave right now I can have both a nice long walk and catch the sunset.

Bye!

5 comments:

Stephanie said...

I watched it too this afternoon!

My discovery of Hannah and Her Sisters was a kind of transformative for me also, though I was in college, and it was the music that really got to me. It wasn't the usual stuff I'd hear when I turned on the radio, and I felt respected, somehow, by the offering of jazz and opera that had some thought behind the selections.

Love this: "I wanted to live in his world, a place where people talk about art, philosophy, history, and architecture, live in comfortably interesting and sophisticated lofts, go to the symphony and listen to jazz"

Lori Mocha said...

I miss NYC.

Step Right Up said...

Poser! Just kidding!

I love Woody Allen films for all the dialogue. I feel as though my brain and thoughts never shut off and it's like his characters have the same issue but say their thoughts out loud. I'm not saying what goes on in my head would be quite the same dialogue but it is a constant conversation in there.

I also have been sleeping on the couch (it's actually a love seat-even worse) because P has the flu. I feel for ya.

AMD said...

"Woody Allen movies (the classic ones) could never work today. All the women would have blogs and all the men would be addicted to online porn."

This made me laugh! I guess blogging is a sign of our times.

ATM said...

a friend's copy of aw's diaries was prime bathroom reading for about a year there in what amd lovingly called 'the men's boarding house,' which was where i lived before moving on up in the world. it was great reading. just sit and flip to a random date. i doubt i made it through the whole thing though.

i used to love the late 70s-early 80s woody stuff. i've tried rewatching a few in recent years--manhattan and annie hall specifically--and found them kinda unbearable. don't know why! i think, like you, i had a grass is greener thing for the urban. now i guess i don't think that way and find those characters annoying! something like that.