Thursday, December 15, 2011

Age of Wonder

First of all, before I forget, you must all go here: This site has TONS of old photographs, from all over the world, in all subject matters. It's fascinating. I lost hours last night to this site.

Last week a young woman who I really only knew because her "friendship" had been recommended to me by a mutual friend on Facebook, accosted me at this mutual friend's house. She was adorably exuberant. "I read everything you write," She said, "And I have a total friend crush on you!" I know that feeling - it is as exciting as a romantic crush. I thought it was so sweet that a young woman in her early 20s would admire and like me so much.

I feel so grateful to have friends of all ages. One of my closest friends, Jude, is in her late 50s after all. It's so valuable to have perspectives and insights that range from idealistic and fresh to experienced and wise. And those perspectives are not attached to any certain ages. That's important to remember.

I am looking forward to developing a friendship with this sweet girl who is at least 12 years my junior. Her energy and enthusiasm are infectious. THANK GOD. Because I'm exhausted. All the time.

Tuesday, December 13, 2011

Workplace? More Like Jerkplace

Work has been...a lot of work lately.

The whole reason I made this blog private is because I had applied for another job and didn't want any potential bosses to read all my weird stories and confessions without first realizing how awesome and job-obsessed I can get.

My current job is getting very annoying. Lots of office politics bullshit. WHICH I HATE MORE THAN ANYTHING. It was office politics, in a way, that made my single worst career event (2003. If I haven't told this story yet it's because it's too awful and insane and long. But most of you have known me a while so you know it. One day I'll write about it...and it will be a screenplay or novel) possible. So yeah, I fucking hate office politics.

I was told that I'm not "approachable." WTF. And, mind you, this is coming from coworkers, not students. My students adore me. I bust my ass for them and it shows. People know when you go above and beyond for them. I hope.

So yeath. Not approachable. What this really means is that my boss doesn't think I'm friendly enough (TOWARDS HER). My sister, who put up with the worst kind of office politics - CORPORATE OFFICE POLITICS - for like 8 years so she really knows what she's talking about. Jessy told me to be super sickly sweet almost-fake friendly towards her, and everyone else if necessary. It's been really hard. Because I hate being fake. I'm the person who, if asked "How's it going?" nearly always answers, "It's going" in a flat tone because it seems most truthful. Gee...why would she ever think I'm unapproachable???

But I've been following my sister's advice and, of course, it's working like a charm. Playing the goddamn game. That's what you have to do to get anywhere in this world. Yuck.

Tomorrow the bigger office of Graduate and International Education is having a taco party and we were all told that our presence was mandatory. You heard me. I'm not allowed to work from 11:30 to 1 tomorrow because I have to eat tacos and play the goddamn game instead. Okay. Fine. If I'm going to play the goddamn game then I'm going to WIN THE GODDAMN GAME. Might as well, right? I'm going to win the taco party.

I made homemade cheese dip (bechamel sauce, grated Chihuaha AND cheddar cheeses, chili powder, pinch of cumin, garlic powder, can of Rotel), homemade key lime pie (hand-squeezed key limes thankyouverymuch), and will make fresh guacamole tomorrow at 10:30am because you can't win if you bring brown guacamole. Hell no.

If I don't report back with a gold medal of food, charm, and schmoozing then you'll know that I'm a loser.

Tuesday, December 06, 2011

Really Pushing It...

It's Monday night.  I have a big, full week ahead of me.  And yet I talked myself into (with help from the new Mister) going to hear this band play tonight.  SO WORTH IT.  How fun is it to go see a band that is talented and tight and young and fun and full of energy?  Plus it was a cold Monday night in a college town the week before final exams.  Hardly anyone was there.  I got told I looked like Charlize Theron and had wine bought for me.  So nice to be the older lady at the bar on Monday night.  I said I'd go from 10-12 and I did.  Then I drove home at midnight with snow blowing all around.  Magical.

Monday, December 05, 2011

How Is It December?

One of the big things I've been trying to remember is that our lives are really just a collection of experiences...and if I can create or arrange a good or unforgettable experience, then WHY THE HECK NOT?

A few months ago I'd just gotten paid.  Since now that I'm living on my own again money's tighter and I rarely have disposable income but I really wanted to provide an experience for Stella and me.  So I sprung the $100 for two tickets to see My Morning Jacket.  The concert is tomorrow night.  I had to really budget tightly the rest of the month in order to get those tickets but I'm so glad I did.  We really need a mom/daughter date.

Holiday season.  Wow.  Okay.  Here we go!

Feeling pretty good about it all, though.  2011 was full of transitions and learning.  So hopefully that means 2012 is about taking those lessons and applying them.  I'm ready to start laying the groundwork for some life changes...

Thank you for sticking with me through this.  I know only about 3 or 4 of you read this still.  I'll probably take the blog public again fairly soon.  But it's been nice to write freely or not write at all.  xoxoxo