Tuesday, January 15, 2013

Hi again.

So Christmas.  It was just my grandmother, who just turned 87(!) and is pretty much the best woman I've ever known, my sister whose personal life has sort of been in upheaval since 2011, my 17 yr old daughter who is preparing for a pretty major life change in the coming year, and crazy-ass, frazzled, confused, exhausted little ol' me.

After Christmas Stella and I drove to Kansas City for three days.  It was beyond awesome and wonderful for us both.  We hadn't had time away, alone together, since our big Colorado road trip.  I had really missed my baby, my weirdo hilarious teenage kid, and needed to reconnect.  And we certainly did!  We decorated our hotel room w/ scarves, ordered in take out dinners almost every night - stuff you can't get in Arkansas like Indian and actual kinda good Chinese.  We hit the sales at the Plaza.  We spent a whole day in Lawrence because Stella has been accepted to KU!  So we went to tour the campus and get a feel for it.  She knew pretty immediately that the campus was too big but she liked the feeling of Lawrence.  We had fun tooling around and finding amazing things in their little shops.  My photos are on the other hard drive so this will be the words version of our trip and the next one will be photos only.

We met up with one of my favorite women in the world for dinner - the breathtakingly kickass beautiful insanely special art piece making friend Flannery Horan.  I want to collect many of her pieces because they will be collector's items.  Each one is just so incredible that you want more and more.  I have to start a Flannery piece piggy bank.

Flannery suggested that on our last morning in KC we should visit the River Bottoms which is the area down near the river where there are several old flea markets.  We found this building all right....all FOUR FLOORS of wonderful, weird, overpriced, one-of-a-kind, fun, bizarro things.  I found something I'd been looking for for over 20 years.  You'll just have to wait for pictoral proof.

I HAVE SO MUCH TO SAY ABOUT SO MANY THINGS!!!  They're all percolating and about ready.  I also want to say how much I appreciate your kind and supportive words - that you're glad to see me back here.  I'm glad to be back!  I love my little waaaaay under the radar internet friends.  I met each of you in interesting and different ways but  here we all are.  I love catching up w/ all of your writing and I hope I can quickly  get back into the habit.  I don't want to only rely on photos when I could describe the scene.

Apropos of nothing - today sucked rotten castrated nuts.  Like that visual?  Ewww, me either but now I can't unsee it.  But I already feel better after coming in here to write nonsense.  NONSENSE.  NO sense of any kind in here.

But I do love you so.  Kisses and combat boots to stomp around in and intimidate others with our enormous, cloddish boots.  I'll stomp and stomp and yet, I'm extremely fragile today.  I could cry any minute now for an unspecified amount of time for reasons still not entirely clear to me.  Hormones and life changes and we're changing and I want to die again.

Love to you regular readers.  You probably know half the shit I'm alluding to  and the other half you could figure out.  I'm a mess but I'm so relieved that you're also out there just trying to get it through each day.

At what point should you cut yourself off from that big dark chocolate and candied ginger bar?  No matter how tantalizing it was?  Please say  half a bar, please?

Here are some posts percolating but needing to get out soon - the wonderful success of an old friend.  My friend Scott - man oh man can he write. And another one on learning that a woman who tried with all her might to ruin my life  is experiencing sad and serious life issues of her own.  Do I feel glib?  Thrilled?  Sad?  Pity?  Validated like crazy?  YES to all.

Trading in chocolate for kale.  Can it happen?  Will I rage and cry out in my sleep?  Will my sugarholic system rebel but then thank me?  We've been down this road many times, my sugar-addicted body and me....

PS - It's now morning.  The horribleness of yesterday is at least a few hours away now...the only reminders are a CAR THAT REFUSES TO START, the every present dull ache in my back, and a chocolate hangover.


I Know Right? said...

Nice...ROTTEN CASTRATED NUTS? And I only just arrived at work?! Sweet jeebus on a pogo stick woman. But alas, I cannot stay upset when I get to read your blog once again. Good luck with all you are going through and a special YAY to the woman thats going through shit after her trying to ruin your life. You are one of the most wonderful people Shauna and I know. You deserve great things!

Carrie said...

Awesome you are going to Austin for Spring Break. Your birthday is a Sunday this year. A celebratory weekend is in order--just gotta decide where....

Stephanie said...

Dang, I hear you, sister, about those damn tears that come outta nowhere. Growlwahaawhimpernumbrageexhaustion.

AMY said...

I love you, Alannah. And I'm attempting to give up sugar this week, and I'm already missing chocolate. When I had some this morning! In solidarity!