Wednesday, December 18, 2013

Not Gone, Not Forgotten

Hello my few and trusty friends still reading.

Okay...since I don't know where to begin I will just jump in. 

Stella is in college.  She is doing well - loving it in fact.  And here's my dirty secret about having an empty nest....I LOVE IT.  I really do.  I love leaving my house in a certain state in the mornings confident that I will return to it in the same state (well...there are two cats at home - but they don't leave wet towels on the floor or dirty dishes in their rooms).  I haven't lived alone since I was 18 and I am loving it.

However, that love was tested last week when we had a freak ice/snow storm that resulted in FOUR days off work.  Counting the weekend that was six days off!  The longest I'd ever been snowed in completely alone.  It was relaxing and productive and I went a little bonkers insane by the fourth day of being cooped up with my car still covered in ice.  I walked around a lot and helped my sister at her shop and slipped and fell on the ice, resulting in a bruised rib.  I went to the doctor to make sure it was just bruised and forgot that I had had blood work done a few weeks ago.  I was informed that my rib would take a few weeks to heal, I have incredibly good cholesterol levels, incredibly low Vitamin D levels AND hypothyroidism.  Huh....I KNEW IT!  I knew it had to be something auto-immune.  I have been so overwhelmingly tired these past few months, falling asleep at my desk, going home from work and immediately falling asleep on the couch, going home for a lunch break and accidentally sleeping for two hours.  My hair has been falling out. My fingers have been all tingly and asleep as well.  I've gained 10 lbs despite eating a mostly plant-based, organic, wheat-and-dairy-free diet.  I knew something was wonky with my body.  Here's hoping that with a little tweaking, my thyroid will be up and chugging along and I'll suddenly lose 30 lbs, get long luxurious healthy locks and nails, and won't feel cold all the time.  HERE'S HOPING.  Once again my belief that the endocrine system is the most fascinating and confusing part of the human body has been cemented.  My friend Jude compares it to the Cosmos - we have no idea how it works but it holds the key to everything.

I have only a handful of days left at my current job.  I'm terrified and exhilarated.  I've been applying for others but haven't heard anything.  Kind of a blow to my ego but I'm hoping that's just because it's the holidays and everything slows down or shuts down temporarily around this time. 

Because we're all broke but still moderately happy we are making all our Christmas gifts.  I am making deodorant (I swear by this.  I love that it only has 4 ingredients too - coconut oil, baking soda, arrowroot powder and essential oils), jewelry, canning salsa, making soups to freeze, and decorative garlands.  We will spend Christmas day leisurely eating brunch, maybe doing some jigsaw puzzles, and then going to see August: Osage County with Stella, Mom, my sister, her beau, and our grandmother.  I'm looking forward to it.  We have enough STUFF.  What we don't have enough of is time to spend together so that is our gift to each other and ourselves.  Although I wish I could afford to get Stella a laptop.  A college student needs a damn laptop. 

I'm off to do more reading and research about thyroids.  Still in extreme back pain (nerve pain) that no one can explain but I'm hoping is really just because of stress.  When I started working at this job seven years ago I was on no medications and was 30 lbs lighter.  Now I'm on FOUR medications, heavier, considerably more gray hairs and wrinkles, but still proud of the work I've accomplished.  I hope that work hasn't been in vain.  I'm not above waiting tables again or bartending...but I was really hoping this job might lead to something higher or at least lateral.  Okay, enough mindless blathering. 


RETA said...

I really enjoyed reading your post. I do hope the thyroid gets working again as it should - and that you will feel better. Please take care and have a wonderful Christmas!


AMY said...

I am excited to read about your next adventure! And please tell me more about this homemade deodorant!